How do we transform the Bar/Bat Mitzvah rite of passage from “a celebration of the child’s Jewish self” to “a Jewish celebration of the child’s whole self”? We designed the innovative Legacy Passage program to do exactly that through engaged-choice. Parents and child are invited into the process as full partners as they choose from a wide range of meaningful engagement options.
The entire Bar and Bat Mitzvah process from beginning to end streams through three stages: training, ceremony, and celebration. Could each one of those stages become in and of itself a life changing experience that effects the child’s healthy emotional development as well as strengthen family bonds?
Our answer is a resounding yes. We view the Bar/Bat Mitzvah experience as a powerful and necessary rite of passage that contributes to the family and child’s overall well being. We begin by asking parents and child to consider the very essence of the Bar/Bat Mitzvah process, which is the passing of legacy from elders to youngster. Just as we, adults, have been shaped by the legacy of our parents – their values, beliefs, stories, unique skills, and important projects – so too our children will be shaped by ours. The life experience of many suggests that one’s Jewish legacy is part of a greater personal and universal whole. What would it look like then, if we passed down our entire legacy package to the Bar or Bat Mitzvah child, not only the Jewish traditional content? This question is our starting point.
The Legacy Passage program is designed to facilitate conscious, deliberate, and heartfelt transmission of a family’s treasured legacy to its young. Since each family’s legacy is unique, each Bar and Bat Mitzvah process, from its inception to the party, is custom designed in close collaboration with the entire family. We help the child’s elders engage with him or her as significant mentors. A set of intelligently challenging and fun assignments help the Jewish child try out and achieve new levels of maturity and connectedness under the guidance of his or her mentors. The ceremony and party thus celebrate the child’s special abilities, the family’s self defined values, the gift of Jewish people-hood, and the soul residing within.
This rite of passage, channeling a loving transmission down the generations, then becomes the soil in which the child’s future holds root. Our Rabbi and expert tutors are more than Jewish-educators. They are coaches who consider Jewish tradition as it uniquely applies in the context of each child’s whole life. Isn’t that exactly what the Bar and Bat Mitzvah rite was originally intended to be?
